Extraordinary Measures

Shit's been busy, SO GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT!  Three new(ish) eventful happenings to share with your fitness-loving asses:
(1)  "Velázquez," creeping on your brain in Issue 2.4 of NAP
(2)  "The Impending Arrival of Rick," spitting game at your stepmom at Hidden Chapter
(3)  "The Non-Binding Employment Discussion," desecrating a gerbil's shallow grave at Defenestration

Arrivederci, boners!